The research is out: One of the best ways to lighten your load in life is to practice the art of forgiveness. A tall order? Maybe, but anyone that has explored what makes life and relationships work has found this to be one of the big keys.



When you let yourself and others off the hook for past errors, a lot of energy is freed up to get on with life and do what really matters today.



What about you? Are those little grudges you’re holding onto siphoning off your precious life energy? (Ok, that was a trick question because, regardless of what you think, the answer is: Most Definitely.)



Here are some cues that your Power of Forgiveness could use some strengthening:


• You’re still processing with your therapists all the anger and resentment you feel about how your family treated you when you were young.
• You beat yourself up for all the things you think you could’ve done better or differently….how you’ve handled your money, how you’ve treated your health, how you treat your kids, etc.
• You’ve lost good friendships because you couldn’t figure out how to forgive and move forward after something ‘went down’.
• You find yourself acting fake when you see your boss or that neighbor you had a run-in with, smiling on the outside, but seething on the inside.
• Sometimes you punish your spouse by not talking or withholding love when you’re angry with him/her…occasionally turning a small disagreement into a full-blown argument.
• You “forgive” someone because you know you should (it’s the spiritual thing to do) or because you need to in order to get by (like a boss), but in fact you’re stomach gets tight or you feel tense or angry every time you see that person.


”Unforgiveness is the poison you drink every day 
hoping that the other person will die.”



~Debbie Ford

 What’s a quick and easy way to free your energy?
Lay down those hard feelings once and for all!


 Chaya here….

I found this on the internet one day, and thought it was so beautifully written and critical to this topic:


”Forgiveness is not about condoning another’s hurtful actions, it’s about releasing your negative emotions and perceptions about the painful events.

Otherwise you keep yourself chained to those events or people – 
you keep it alive within you – and you carry it with you wherever you go.

 

It’s a very heavy burden to carry around and you end up 
crippling yourself emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically.”


Ok, well, writing this email is proving to be kind of difficult for me….it’s making me realize I’ve really got to up my game. My own Power of Forgiveness is not as strong as it could be.

I’m pretty good when something happens now in my life that’s upsetting….I can feel my feelings, trust that I must’ve needed that experience on some level, know that the other person did their very best in that moment, feel empathy for both of us, and move toward acceptance.

It may take a little time, but I can usually get there.

BUT….as I review my past, there are a few sticky people who do not pass through my mind with ease. I feel a little “Grrr” as their face pops in. With a couple of them, the feeling is really intense, even though the experience I perceived as an infraction is more than 20 years old!

Some part of me still wants to hang on to the victim-hood, think of them as the “mean girls” who hurt me. Wow, what a drain – it seems so ridiculous now that I think about it. Talk about giving my power away!

A few years ago I bought a book called Radical Forgiveness by Colin Tipping. I skimmed through it and loved his philosophy. But I never got around to doing the exercises though, and even ‘misplaced’ the book for awhile. I guess I wasn’t really ready to put down my burdens quite yet.

I’m admitting this little secret to you in hopes that my confession holds me accountable. If you’re also needing to sharpen up your Power of Forgiveness, then you know you’re not alone.

So, here’s my plan….

Step 1: Right now, I forgive myself for not getting around to this sooner, for not being a more evolved human being, and for holding grudges!!!

Step 2: I make a commitment right now to myself, with you as my witness, that I’m going to take the Peach ColorEssence daily, and get back to my book and do the exercises in it.

I’m going to stick with it until I know I’ve truly forgiven the “mean girls” because they’ll have, as Rev. Karyl Huntley says, “harmless passage through my mind.”

If you’re being drained by old resentments too, I hope you’ll join me on this quest to forgive.

Forgive yourself and others to have
more room to love yourself and others!


Tap into your Power of Forgiveness – it will make your life much easier!


• Those victim stories of your childhood will transform, and the resentment that is blocking you from having a totally loving relationship with your family will melt away.
• You’re confidence will go up, the misery will go down, and your health and sleep will improve because you’ll be less judgmental and more accepting of your actions and choices.
• You’ll heal old friendships and keep the current ones healthy and happy.
• You won’t develop ulcers from the unresolved grudges burning inside, and when you see those people you used to have anger toward, you’ll feel peace and freedom, and able to be real with them.
• You’ll find loving ways to get through those difficult moments with your spouse, quickly and without creating unnecessary damage.
• You won’t forgive someone “because you should”. You’ll forgive because it feels better than hanging on to the hurt.